DJ Cait #1: October's creepy rave
Magdalena Bay, lo-fi horror, Bladee, online music subculture.
In Cait’s world, October was all about lo-fi horror, 365 party girls, and longing for the rain.
My top sources of inspiration this month have been:
Movies: I watched I Saw The TV Glow alone with the lights off. I watched The Substance in a packed theater.
Music videos: I saw all of Magdalena Bay’s Imaginal Disk music videos (and went to their live show!), and immediately remembered how much I love creepy, old internet stuff. I loved browsing Creepypasta and watching found footage horror movies in middle school.
New music: Brat remix album, new Slayyyter, new FKA Twigs, new Toro y Moi, new Haley Henderickx, Eartheater’s cover of Fade Into You, etc.
I’ve been feeling a mixture of unsettled, ready to party, and ready to brood like Bella Swan even though it’s 80 degrees outside. So sit back, don’t relax, and get on board with the first edition of DJ Cait.
The full Spotify playlist is here. Even though I’ll review the first 10 songs, I’ll add more to the playlist as I see fit (because it’s… what’s that…? My blog, and I can do whatever I want? Yes!). Let’s dive in:
This feels like a good playlist opener. It’s the song you play when you have new friends in the car and you want them to think you’re cool. The beat is sick, the lyrics don’t make any sense but they’re fun, and the song is really just here to get you bon bon. I like that she sounds like she doesn’t give a fuck but she’s dancing anyway.
The title of this song is already accurate to how it feels, but the music video takes this feeling to another level. Picture a retro video game gone wrong, technology that makes your head explode, and the lead singer’s face melting off (and also exploding). Enough said.
One of the comments on this music video describes Machine Girl as “if Aphex Twin produced a punk band” and it’s an apt comparison; they are a badass blend of punk and electronica.
Geordie Greep’s debut album, The New Sound, is quite the chaotic journey into #ToxicMasculinity and #MaleLoneliness. These buzzword-y themes have made Greep’s internet presence take on a new role in this album’s reception and rollout, which is interesting to say the least (like this one review calling him the King of Meme Rock).
Needless to say, the satire and chaos takes hold in this lead single, where Greep is a self-obsessed asshole begging a prostitute to admire him. His lyricism and crooning voice are extra special here, blending together to create the perfect sleazy, Steely Dan inspired (?) anthem.
This song is probably my favorite from the remix album, even if it feels more like a remix of 365 than Club classics. It’s the most danceable track on the album and has one of the more memorable verses. I find myself singing along to “baddie en el club, brat en el club” way more than I thought I would.
In contrast to Holy Holy by Geordie Greep, No Comma is an unapologetic embrace of being a hot woman that everyone wants to fuck. Slayyyter wants you to know that she is not lonely, you shouldn’t mess with her or her pink Swarovski gun, and she has an army of gays at her beck and call. I love the dark, Hollywood-inspired aesthetic that she started using in her previous album, and I hope she leans into it more. It’s so stylized and unique.
Behold this text exchange between me and my brother:
I especially enjoy the synths and the beat in the last minute of the song starting at 1:30. Bladee has such a soft and melodic voice and poetic lyrics wrapped up in an almost ironic, post-post-postmodern production. It’s easy to see why Drain Gang made a heavy impact on Soundcloud rap and other online music subcultures.
Valgur opened for Magdalena Bay on their tour and wow!! I was really impressed. They came out in hooded cloaks like Jedi and held up a sword - an immediate vibe. I’m a huge fan of the dark fantasy and electronica combination, so I ate it up.
Their melodies are catchy, their sound is retro and fresh, their aesthetic is uncanny and indie—they’re great. This song felt fitting in particular since it has vampires.
Every alternative baddie wants, or wants to be, FKA Twigs. I know for a fact that dance studios all over Southern California are running to put this song on their warmup playlists or for their next contemporary routine. I can already picture the next dancer with one leg of his sweatpants rolled up absolutely crushing the Eusexua dance routine. There was not a single CorePower class left untouched by the FKA Twigs drop.
It’s because Twigs is so delicate, yet powerful here. She sublimates (in the Freudian sense) her desires into her the way she moves her body and even the way her voice cracks. It’s weird yet elegant, muted yet loud. It’s eusexua.
When I watched I Saw The TV Glow, I kept thinking about this song. The song and the movie have a very similar theme and message: you use media (TV, TikTok videos, YouTube) to repress your emotions and distract yourself from what you need to confront. You need to “meet the monsters around you” (as referenced in the song, or through the Mr. Melancholy character in The Pink Opaque) in order to accept yourself and grow as a person. It’s very easy to avoid this and live vicariously through the characters on your screen, creating a shell of who you really are.
The song is still gentle, like it’s holding your hand through this realization. These feelings are easier said than done, like we all instinctively know this, but can’t act on them yet. To get the full emotional effect, you should really listen to this song and the next one, Tunnel Vision, back-to-back.
What I love about Imaginal Disk is that it’s the first album I’ve listened to that artfully grapples with being raised online. Your identity, including how you perceive yourself, how others perceive you, your hobbies, what gives your life meaning and joy — is all indescribably blurred and obscured online. Everyone has spent an entire day on their phone, wondering where the hours have passed or why they’re doing this, and continue to do it anyway. Imaginal Disk (and especially these two songs) is the first album I’ve listened to that speaks to that experience and its accompanying emotions.
I interpret the lyrics:
“Then I see tunnel vision
Closing in over me
I forget with love as my witness
I can stand on my feet
I fall back then I see”
As the desire to take your life back from this ever-present, online force. Real love, through your friends, family, or relationships, is the key to breaking yourself out of this cycle, finding your own worth and creating your life’s meaning. There’s something quite beautiful about the phrase “with love as my witness,” like love is always there for you, watching and waiting for you to come back to it. But the process of finding this fulfilling life for yourself isn’t linear and you might fall down and get back up several times. The instrumental outro is a cathartic, grungy release. Song of the year for me.
Honorable mentions:
Starburned and Unkissed by Caroline Polachek
Did you really think I would mention I Saw The TV Glow so many times and not mention its amazing soundtrack? Starburned and Unkissed has a great needle drop that made me tear up as the edible kicked in.
It’s also just an emotional, complex song about desire. Even the phrase “unkissed” conjures a lot of rumination — the state of being “unkissed” really emphasizes desire and longing, the feeling that you should be kissed but are left without it. One of the lines “my heart’s a ghost limb reaching” is a gut wrench. She’s lost her ability to feel or love with her heart, but desires it anyway. It’s my favorite song on the soundtrack.
The Afterparty - Disco Version by Portraits of Tracey
Okay, okay, last one. This song is #15 on my playlist, but #1 in my heart. Genuinely. The production is so good, and completely independent. When that synth kicks in at 2:22 (angel numbers??) you will start to LEVITATE.
I hope you enjoyed these mini reviews. Let me know what you were inspired by this month and the music you’re bumpin to!!